bounce check

A mental and physical state of readiness to leave at any moment — shoes on, bag in hand, eyes on the exit, and waiting for the slightest excuse to dip. Being in bounce mode means you've already mentally checked out; you're just waiting for the polite window. It can be triggered by a bad vibe, a boring conversation, a situation that's going sideways, or simply the recognition that peak fun has passed. Bounce mode is your internal bounce check running on a continuous loop.

When your attempt to make a clean exit goes completely wrong — you announce you're leaving but get pulled back into conversation, your goodbye tour extends by 45 minutes, or you dramatically bounce only to realize you left your phone and have to return. A bounce fail is universally relatable and deeply embarrassing in proportion to how confidently you announced the bounce. The more theatrical the original exit, the worse the failure. It's the universe's way of keeping you humble about your own social timing.

Someone who has elevated the act of leaving early and strategically to an art form — always knowing exactly when to dip, never overstaying their welcome, never getting caught in a dying vibe. The bounce god reads the room before anyone else, makes their exit cleanly, and somehow still manages to be the most talked-about person after they've left. They don't announce their departure; they simply evaporate at the perfect moment. Being called a bounce god is a compliment wrapped in mild jealousy.